Ryan Casto, LPCC

Associate Director, New Creation Counseling Center

7 November 2017

Since it is November, I figured I could not go without writing an article on the topic of Thanksgiving. Unfortunately Thanksgiving has probably not gotten a fair shake lately, with the ever-expanding Christmas season. For my wife and I, Christmas begins November 1st. Thanksgiving becomes something of an auxiliary or supporting holiday to the big one in December. I'm sure none of you find this annoying at all (listen, all I ask is that you don't hurt me when I'm making you listen to Christmas music the day after Halloween). But Thanksgiving, we do love you. You are not forgotten.

Thanksgiving is a call to intentionally give thanks. And that intentionality is important. We are good at doing what we want, when we want to do it. We are losing the art of doing what is best, even when we don't want to do it. That's a real problem because when I feel depressed, and then I act depressed (e.g. shut down, withdraw, decrease activity, decrease socializing), the way I act feeds back into how I feel. That is how depression becomes a pit that sucks you in. You feel sad, then you act sad, which makes you feel more sad, which leads to you acting more sad. The way out of that pit is learning to act differently than how you feel like acting.

This is what giving thanks is about. You don't feel grateful. Your life looks like there's nothing good going on. And you don't want to be grateful. You want to say (to paraphrase George Costanza) "you can stuff your gratitude in a sack, mister!". But God, awesome as ever, commands us to rejoice ALWAYS. And in case you missed it the first time, he says "and again I say, rejoice!". This is the same guy who said to his disciples "let not your heart be troubled" on the worst night of their lives! Are you serious?

And he's not trying to be difficult or unfair or without understanding or empathy. He actually knows all of the ways that we struggle and are tempted. No, he is not being difficult, but he knows what is best for us. He knows what the mental health experts have discovered - that how we act is inextricably linked to how we think and feel. So if you act thankful, you will start thinking thankful and feeling thankful. If you make yourself rejoice, you will start feeling joyful. And before anyone says "fake it till you make it"...it's not that. No, the fact is that we become hardened to the truth that everything good and perfect in our lives is a gift from God, down to the air we breathe. When we act thankful, even though we don't feel thankful, we're not faking anything. We are acknowledging the truth with our actions, rather than letting our feelings dictate how we act. It allows us to become more sensitive and responsive to the truth, and it breaks up that hardness of heart that we get into. And that leads to us experiencing different feelings: joy, peace, contentment, and confidence in God.

If you've read this far, then I would ask you to take a minute and thank God. Rejoice and give thanks to God, for being alive, for having a home, for having food, a job, a family. For breath. For not living in a war zone. Thank God for your children. If your loved ones are gone, thank God for the time you had with them. If you've read this far, then thank God that you can read. Thank God that things aren't worse than they are. Even though it may not feel like it, there is always a reason to give thanks.